The Bean!

93.1 WXRT is always a safe bet when you're in the mood to hear Chicago's finest rock, but evidently, it's especially listenable at 4:30 or so in the morning. As we pulled away from our apartment at 4:24, a mere 4 minutes past our noble goal of being on the road by 4:20... ...they were playing "There She Goes Again" by the La's. There she goes again indeed.

The original draft of this tour had us doing a stop in Philadelphia on Thursday, February 19th, but there were limited indie bookstores available, and none of their schedules seemed to sync up with ours, so we had to scrap that plan in favor of a two-night stand in Brooklyn. The closest we came to Philly was changing planes in the airport this morning. But here is a picture of the City of Brotherly Love (or at least some heavy machinery in said city's general vicinity) as seen from my window, just before takeoff: So far, people on the East coast have been as nice as they were way out West, including the gentleman who offered me the window seat on the second leg of the trip, thereby giving me the opportunity to bring you state-of-the-art aerial imagery of what we saw below (water, land) and how we stayed so high above (engine, wing): As we landed in Boston, I was on the phone with Melissa King, my saintly publicist, working out the whereabouts of some books we'd shipped to Provincetown for tomorrow night's reading. Sarah Messer, author of Red House --which I remember selling quite a few of back in my bookseller days at the Museum of Fine Arts right here in Boston--overheard me, since she happened to be sitting in the row above. As we walked off the jetway, she expressed her well-wishes for the rest of the tour. Thanks, Sarah!

Because we are thrifty and efficient, here are some pictures of me... ...and Kyle eating peanut butter sandwiches on the MBTA on our way to John Cotter and Elisa Gabbert's house. That's where we are now, looking forward to seeing you at this evening's reading at Brookline Booksmith tonight at 7. What better way to celebrate Presidents' Day than by hearing excerpts from Live Nude Girl and In the Devil's Territory, plus whatever Steve Almond decides to read?

The City is Windy, But the Company is Warm

It's 10:30 pm Central Standard Time, an hour and a half from Day Fourteen of the tour. We've blitzkrieged our way across the western half of the country and back: Toledo/Chicago, Los Angeles, San Francisco, Portland, Seattle, Bellingham, Tacoma, Minneapolis, Milwaukee, and, the last few days, Chicago again.

For me, it was one part break, one part frenzy. I arrived Wednesday with Milwaukee host extraordinaire Drew Blanchard, who introduced me to Peruvian poets and their signature liquors, toured me through the offices of the Cream City Review, took me to a place that served bacon wrapped in cheese wrapped in egg roll and deep fried, let me sleep, let me launder my clothes, let me play with his dogs, and drove me to Chicago. I've stopped counting the favors I owe him.

After arriving, I hightailed it to Sheffield's, where I read with such luminaries as Matt Bell, Amy Guth, Darlin Neal, and Mike Czyzniejewski. (Apologies in advance for the name dropping. There's more to come. Everyone in the world was in town for the AWP Conference!) The crowd was enthusiastic, and the room was more than full. I got to see some old friends there, too, among them Cliff Garstang, who shared news of his forthcoming book, and my editor, Dan Wickett.

By ten we were done, and I was off to Division Street, to spend the evening carousing with my brother and our old friend Tim Sheff, who knew all the best places to eat and drink, and right in the part of town where meets the north and south sides and the east and west sides, which gives me license, I suppose, to say that I visited all four quadrants of the city.

Thursday I went for a long walk with the celebrated Roy Kesey (newly returned from Beijing!, a loss for China but a real coup for Syracuse, New York), visited the art museum (Van Gogh! Van Gogh!) with the painter Trent Miller and the poet J. L. Conrad, also old friends. Also: lunched with Twentysomething Essays alum Joey Franklin, cruised the bookfair (where I got to see Laura van den Berg, Mike Alber, Aaron Burch, and more friends and more), dinnered with Anthony Neil Smith (we talked Plots with Guns, genre fiction, and our shared love for both) and eveninged at the only semi-empty hotel bar on Michigan Avenue, with Keith Lee Morris, Joe Oestreich, Heather Kirn, a very inebriated poet of new acquaintance, three gutter punks, and a few homeless ladies.

Friday was the AWP reading with my fellow Dzanc authors -- Allison Amend, Roy Kesey, Mike Czyzniejewski, and Louella Bryant. The room was packed with friends, many of whom I had seen during the West Coast leg of the tour, and it was also warm with goodwill -- a credit to the people at Dzanc, especially Dan Wickett, who organized the reading and introduced us with characteristic generosity.

After dinner with Dan and Matt Bell, I wandered back to the hotel, where I met up with Christopher Coake, Mike Alber, and a bunch of Ohio State MFA students. We rode the El to Pizzeria Due, where we feasted on their world-famous pizza, brainstormed titles for Mike's TV pilot, and talked shop about books, writing, and literature (not necessarily in that order.) I enjoyed almost everything about these days in Chicago, but the time with Chris, Mike, and the others, was no doubt the best of it. I was sad to see the evening end.

Saturday I joined Pinckney Benedict, Scott Kaukonen, David McGlynn, and Angela Pneuman, for a panel on Postevangelical Literature, a term none of us could define, but I guess we knew it when we saw it. The room again was overfull, and the audience fairly enthusiastic about our talk of love for Catholic writers like Flannery O'Connor, Andre Dubus, and Graham Greene, and half the fun was watching Pinckney hold forth with his characteristic straight talk and good humor.

I was lucky afterward to spend twenty minutes with Erin McGraw, one of my teachers from grad school days, and now a mentor and friend. (This, too, was a real highlight.) Then I hightailed it back to Wicker Park, where I joined my brother and his wife for their Valentine's Day dinner and a rousing game of Uno. We spent the evening resting, and Sunday all of us got some work done -- my brother working on some new songs, his wife studying for law school, me returning emails and figuring out how to get everywhere in Boston tomorrow.

Then I took the train north, to Kathy and Martin's house. We shared dinner (potato kale soup, oatmeal biscuits, and cherry cake) with Kathy's sister Beth and her husband Nick, and I finally got to meet Martin for the first time (and a first-class guy, he is.) I write you from their computer, and now I'm off to bed, just in time to get a few hours of sleep before the 3:20 am wakeup call.

See you in Boston?

Sweet home Chicago

Sunday has been a day of rest. Three things I miss the most when I am on the road include:

1) Martin,
2) yoga, and
3) homecooked food, both the making and the eating thereof.

So today, Martin and I made eggs and blueberry-sour cream muffins for Elisa and Abby, who were still crashing with us. Abby's second muffin is pictured here; the eggs are long since devoured: After I went to yoga, Martin and I made potato kale soup. Martin is pictured here, moving with lightning speed to get the kale in soup-ready shape: My sister Beth and her husband Nick are on their way over with homemade bread and strawberry cake, and Kyle will be joining us, both so he can meet the fam, and so he can get a lift to the airport with me and Martin, since we fly out of O'Hare at 6:00 am. If you are in or near Boston/Brookline, MA tomorrow night, be sure to come hear us read with the inimitable Steve Almond!

AWP we <3 U

Are the best things in life really free, and is the AWP Bookfair one of the best things in life? Such were the heavy questions we pondered today, the day the bookfair was open to the public at no charge to them. Part of that public included the winner of the second annual Rose Metal Press Short Short Chapbook contest, Geoffrey Forsyth, who showed up to sign books...
...and to give Abby and me some adorable disassemble-able erasers all the way from Japan by way of the kids' clothing and toy store he manages when he's not writing incredible flash fiction... Other standout moments included a visit to our table by Sean Lovelace, who is the winner of our third annual chapbook contest and who knows how some people like their eggs...
...as well as an appearance by indie publishing genius Dan Wickett:

Tomorrow, Kyle and I have a day off before we continue the tour on the East coast on Monday.

Chicago, that somber city

The Friday we just experienced was a 13th, thus it was sinister, but maybe not surprising to see this voodoo bike parked outside the Chicago Hilton on the way back to the AWP Conference: Fortunately, the sights inside the exhibit halls were more auspicious, including Crystal, our Chicago-based intern, helping to (wo)man the Rose Metal Press table alongside Carol Guess, who was doing a signing for Tinderbox Lawn: Everyone was highly impressed with their saleswomanship and professionalism, particularly Chris Tonelli and Dan Boehl: Elsewhere, University of Arkansas Press marketing director Tom Lavoie saw that all was well at their booth, and even took a moment from his sell sell selling to peruse Live Nude Girl in front of the handsome display; it is important to have a marketing team that really gets you, and Tom and Melissa King (not pictured) totally are that team: On our way to lunch with the editors of our upcoming Rose Metal Press Field Guide to Prose Poetry, Abby, Dan, Gary and I passed a sign that reminded me yet again why Chicago is, as they say, my kinda town:
But despite the allure of Obamartinis, we continued on to the luscious Eleven City Diner, where Abby and I split what we believe to be the best French toast of our collective lives; note that while the toast set us back a cool $10.95, the Guilt (listed at the bottom of the menu) was free: As we chatted about the finer points of the forthcoming Field Guide, we discovered Dan and Gary's taste in sandwiches appears to be as good as their taste in prose poems. Dan... ...and Gary: From 2-3, while valiantly fighting off a French toast-induced food coma, I did a signing at the Switchback Books table, staffed by Brandi Homan, pictured here, and next to Claire Hero and Kristy Bowen (both sort of pictured in the background, next to the chair, recently vacated by me), representing dancing girl press: And last but not least, I fully intended to help get all experimental on everyone's ass at Links Hall... ...courtesy of the Red Rover reading series, hosted by Jen Karmin and Lisa Janssen, pictured here with their awesome tent: ...but I've been sort of low-grade sick for the last two weeks (with antibiotics and everything!), and I had to bail at the intermission. The spirit was willing, but the flesh was feverish. Martin and I made our way back to the train, past the snowmen and no trespassing signs... ...to rest up for tomorrow and the rest of the tour. One more day of conferencing left! Come on down to the Northwest exhibit hall and say hey.

I am an American, Chicago-born...

Chicago is a rather lengthy city from North to South. Here, Abby is seen sporting her red coat and taking the 45 minutes afforded by the ride on the red line from my apartment to the AWP Conference in the Loop to get in a little crosswordery, courtesy of the Redeye: Once we got to the Chicago Hilton, we entered one of the many cavernous exhibit halls, where the Rose Metal Press table was looking attractive and bookish: And speaking of attractive and bookish, here's a picture of Martin: After spending most of the day beneath the unforgiving fluorescent lights of the Bookfair, it was refreshing to spend most of the night beneath the softer and more soothing lights of the Hideout, where even this wall-mounted Mahi Mahi looked tranquil: Elisa lives in Boston, so she and I don't get to read together nearly often enough, so we try to make it count when we do. Here we are, rocking the mic: Thanks to Make/ACM/etc for hosting, and thanks to everyone for listening. Now, it's back to the Bookfair to do the same thing we did yesterday all over again. Tonight, if you're free, be sure to come by the small press readings at Links Hall, starting at 8:00.

Home field advantage

You know how you love your friends so much, you wonder how it might feel to be them? Me too, and that is why I found myself trying on Abby's big red coat, as we hung out in my apartment last night with Elisa Gabbert and Sarah Bartlett. All three of them are staying with Martin and me during the AWP Conference here in Chicago:
This is Elisa, with whom I'll be reading (along with John Beer, Arda Collins, Joel Craig, William Hillman, Dan McCann, Caroline Picard, and Greg Purcell) tonight at the MAKE: a Chicago literary magazine/ACM/Action Books/Green Lantern Press off-site event at the Hideout at 1354 W. Wabansia in Chicago at 7:30 pm: While we were sitting there, she got a text from her friend Farrah that said "subtext and buttsex are anagrams." Think about it.

Well it's Ninth and Hennepin, and all the doughnuts have names that sound like prostitutes

In what is rapidly becoming our tour MO, we went to bed late and got up early, which turned out to be wise. That way, we had plenty of time to check out the small but charming redlight district of Minneapolis, handily located near the bus station, kind of under the freeway: Matt gave us a ride on his way to work, and even waited with the car running while I hopped out and took a picture of the many-bulbed sign advertising LIVE NUDE MODELS whose work is different than mine, but probably no less inspiring. The models are based at Sexworld, just across the street from Midwest XXX: Halfway between Minneapolis and Milwaukee, we stopped for a half hour at a Love’s/Hardee’s combo reststop/gas station in Oakdale, Wisconsin, a town whose name I was able to figure out thanks to the water tower behind the Megabus and trees in this picture: Despite lacking the promised WiFi, the Megabus still won us over with its cheapness and with the way its name resembles that of a Transformer. The sky was gloomy and gray at first... ...but people everywhere seemed in good spirits and kept up the pattern of niceness we have come to appreciate about this tour, including our fellow Megabus passengers. For example, while I was taking this picture, I was feeling more than a little like something the cat dragged in, but then a gentleman whose name I would learn was Maurice came up and asked me 1) what my name was, 2) where I was from, and 3) if I would like to accompany him to the clubs back in Chicago tonight. No, Maurice, but thank you for asking.

Before the reading, Drew Blanchard picked us up and took us to his place for lunch. The sky was blue...
...and his dogs are adorable: He was our heroic guide as we read to students in the undergrad and grad programs of University of Wisconsin Milwaukee, where their art department hangs pictures of live semi-nude people on the wall: Tonight, Kyle crashes in the ‘waukee, and I Amtrak back to Chicago for the AWP Conference where we are both doing a bunch of events, as are about a million other really great writers. Rose Metal Press will have a table there—number 441!—so please come by and say hi, since Abby and I will probably be there like 90 percent of the time. I can’t wait to meet you. Yeah, you.

Grain Belt Premium

Tonight's reading at the Loft in Minneapolis was so kickass, I don't even know where to start, so I'll begin by saying that Rebecca Kanner was fantastic to read with, plus she made us all seriously wish we had tickets to the gun show: We started the evening with dinner at Harry's, downtown, where I ordered the kind of beer whose bottles were used to make this chandelier... ...and where Jana ordered a "Wedge Salad" that ended up being more of a salad boob. With bacon:
Afterwards, we went to Grumpy's, which is not named after one of the Seven Dwarfs, despite what its name suggests; it features prominently in the very good story that Rebecca read:
Super-special thanks to Dick, pictured to the far right, for the good stories, and to Shannon with the Cannon at the Loft who is not pictured, but who took many pictures: Everything about this evening felt really encouraging, but maybe the best part of all was that they put our names on the marquee. We stood underneath it and Matt took our picture: From here, we appear small. But together we are mighty. Look out.

By the Numbers, Toledo/Chicago to Minneapolis

Miles Traveled Thus Far, According to MapQuest: 5296.59 miles
Miles Yet to Travel: 8437.12 miles
Cities Visited: 7
Cities Yet to Visit: 18
Highest Estimated Turnout: 40-50 (Seattle, WA)
Lowest Estimated Turnout: 10-15 (San Francisco, CA)
Total Alcoholic Beverages Consumed, Kyle plus Kathy: 9
Total Automobile Trips: 11
Total Bus Trips: 7
Total Train Trips (Including Transfers): 5
Total Plane Trips: 3
Shortest Night's Sleep: 4 hours
Longest Night's Sleep: 8 1/2 hours
Longest Period of Waking Alone Time Per Tourmate So Far (Average): 37 minutes
Total Apartments Slept In: 3
Total Houses Slept In: 3
Total Airplanes Slept In: 3
Total Buses Slept In: 0
Total Cars Slept In: 1
Total Hotels Slept In: 0
Total Peanut Butter Sandwiches Consumed: 4
Total Packages of Saltine Crackers Stolen from Minneapolis Restaurants: 7
Total Awkward Moments: 17
Total Transcendent Moments: 6
Number of Times I Have Been Addressed as Kevin in After-Reading Q&A's or Signings: 2
Number of Stories About Prague-to-Mongolia Road Rallies Told in Bars: 1
Number of Cool and/or Interesting People We've Met So Far: Approximately 273
Number of Times Kathy Has Publicly Missed Martin: 19 1/2

The heart of the heart of the country

This morning, we took a plane from SeaTac to Minneapolis. As is common in the industry, the airplane had wings, one of which you can see from my window here: We got up at 4:30 am, so it would have been pleasant to take a nap on the plane. Unfortunately, while I possess an array of unexpected skills (a killer serve in badminton, for instance) I am terrible at sleeping on planes, so instead I stayed awake, reading the New Yorker and memorizing the bones of the inner ear, which were featured in an article I came across there (malleus, incus, stapes, aka club, anvil, stirrup, in case you were wondering). I also continued to read My Diva:65 Gay Men on the Women Who Inspire Them, edited by Michael Montlack and pictured here... ...which I am enjoying, and which I will be reviewing for an upcoming issue of BITCH. As you can see, there was sun above the clouds, shining in all sparkly on my tray table and notes. The light in the Pacific Northwest is so gray and indirect. As it turns out, it's gray and indirect here in Minnesota today too... If you are also here, in this light in the Twin Cities, then come to the Loft tonight to hear us read with the Rebecca Kanner! Special thanks to Matt Rasmussen who picked us up from the airport, and Janna Rasmussen who made the elaborate brownies pictured below. We are staying at their house because they are super-nice like that.

City of Destiny

A lot of writers get nervous before their readings. Some of them have a drink or two to take the edge off. Others have their friends dress their pets in reindeer outfits. Whatever works, you know? Tonight, we read in the Community Room at the shiny and relatively new Garfield Book Company on the campus of Pacific Lutheran University, where Jason Skipper, our co-reader, handed out candy to the crowd: A lot of my former students showed up and so, of course, I had to take their picture: We know we need to go to bed relatively soon, because our flight tomorrow is at the crack of dawn. But Jen and Jason were nice enough to buy us an entire container of Western Family brand peanut butter, so I made us some sandies for the road tomorrow: Super-special thanks to Jen Smith for doing the introductions this evening. If you happen to be in or passing through the Twin Cities tomorrow, be sure to stop by and see us read at the Loft with Rebecca Kanner.